The URPG Times (4/16 - 4/22)

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Content Page

1. A Word From Your Editor
2. News And Events
3. Announcements
4. Trading Section
5. Special Coverage: BW Tournament
6. FFAs
7. Comics
8. Article: Panic About Presents
9. Featured Member Interview Q&A
10. Featured Gym Leader Interview Q&A
11. Pokémon Of The Week
12. Trainer Of The Week
13. Story Of The Week
14. Roleplayer Of The Week
15. Spendthrift Of The Week
16. Closing Comment

A Word From Your Editor
By Ataro

I don't feel like talking. :spin:


News And Events
By Ataro

Ultra RPG Easter, Stupid Life
As stupid as it might sounds, the event is a chance for you to gain a new Pokémon for an extremely cheap price! At only $2k, you get to receive an egg, which will eventually hatch into one of the Pokémon in your stats. Even if it might not be something rare, it is something to cheer about since you're only paying $2k! Hurry over and purchase your egg, the event is closing in about 22 more hours!
Click Here!

Ultra RPG Easter, Stupid Gift Away
As stupid as this sounds too, it is something great! Your favorite gift stations have arrived again. It is time to present gifts to people whom you treasure and respect; your friends, colleagues, or rivals. It is open up till May 2nd, so do get over there if you want to gift something ... or simply rid your stats of junk. :ksmile:
Click Here!

The Egg-citing Wheel of Fortune (Park Easter Event)
The event for Park has arrived! By paying $2k, you get to have a chance to get a shot at the wheel of fortune. Prizes include Park Vouchers, Park Items, and more. However, most of all, there are special items that you won't be able to find anywhere else except in this raffle! Hurry over and get your luck tested, as you stand a chance to win incredible items to help you with your Park expeditions.
Click Here!

New Pokémon up for bid!
A new Pokémon is up for bid in the auction house, and this time, it's a Joltik! Bidding ends in approximately 1½ more days!
Click Here!

New Grader in Town!
Our favorite Tyranitex is now an official grader! Let's wish him well as he do good, and hopefully he would be able to help with some of the backlog.
Click Here!

Gym Applications!
The Ghost-type - Hearthome Gym, and the Psychic-type - Saffron Gym, are currently open! Do post your gym application form if you're interested.
Click Here!


Annoucements

If you don't know yet, we do take in announcement requests for The URPG Times. Don't worry, for it is free of charge! If you would like to display an announcement for whatever reason, or shoutouts, just PM them to me.


Trading Section
By Fierce Deity

The following are UFT offers. Do check the the Trading Machine if you see a Pokémon that you're interested in!

• Flammenwerfer: Archeops, Flygon, Gyarados, Machamp, Mamoswine, Muk, Salamence, Serperior
• Chasey: Golbat, Golduck, Houndoom, Ludicolo, Marowak, Medicham, Poliwhirl, Raichu, Slowbro, Voltorb
• We Taste Pies...: Azumarill, Drapion, Gengar, Gyarados, Heracross, Lickilicky, Machamp, Mismagius
• Tyranitex: Vespiqueen
• Team Evolution: Garchomp, Haxorus

Special Coverage - BW Tournament: Round Three
By Ataro

Excited for the top predictor for Round Two!? Here it is! We have a total of 11 people betting on people that they think would move on this round. In the case of people not betting for them or their opponent in a specific round, I gave them the point/bet won if they did win that match.

1. Neonsands: [100% Hit] [0% Miss] (7/7 ; 0/7)
2. Alaskapigeon: [71.4% Hit] [28.6% Miss] (5/7 ; 2/7)
3. Pidge: [71.4% Hit] [28.6% Miss] (5/7 ; 2/7)
4. We Taste Pies...: [71.4% Hit] [28.6% Miss] (5/7 ; 2/7)
5. Husnain: [57.1% Hit] [42.9% Miss] (4/7 ; 3/7)
6. Team Evolution: [57.1% Hit] [42.9% Miss] (4/7 ; 3/7)
7. The Jr Trainer: [57.1% Hit] [42.9% Miss] (4/7 ; 3/7)

FFAs
By MuddyMudkip

• 1st/19th: derian with Mamoswine, reffed by Pidge. Special Rule: A move can't be used more than once in a turn. For example, the first person to use Substitute will stop anyone after using Substitute to fail for that turn. Also, everyone starts with Substitute and 75%.
  
• 1st/14th: Rohypnol with Kingdra, reffed by ChainReaction01. Special Rule: First person to send an attacking move gets +20% BP
  
• 1st/15th: Husnain with Scizor, reffed by ChainReaction01. Special Rule: [none]
  
• 1st/8th: Pidge with Alakazam, reffed by Ataro (aka. RUSTYREFBOT) Special Rule: Three randomly selected participants will be Mafia. If Mafia are last survivors, they get +$1k each. If all Mafias are killed and there are survivors still, those remaining survivors get +$1k each.
  
• 1st/21th: The Jr Trainer with Kingdra, reffed by Pidge Special Rule: See the person's name rather than what Pokemon they are.
  
• 1st/16th: Pidge with Starmie, reffed by derian Special Rule: A random mon holds "The One Ring", and they receive +2 to every stat. This stat change is invisible, and only they know they have it. If you attack this mon, you get the one ring. Only you will know you have it. If the holder of the one ring is destroyed, Sauron is defeated. If the one ring is not destroyed by the 10th turn, Frodo loses his finger. If you hold the one ring for more than 2 consecutive turns, you are subjected to taunt until you lose the ring.
  
• 1st/9th: Synthesis with Gallade, reffed by Buzzer Special Rule: Everyone has Super Luck as an additional Ability
  
• 1st/24th: Husnain with Scizor, reffed by Pidge [FFA Tournament]
  
• 1st/20thth: kingrptor101 with Starmie, reffed by ChainReaction01 Special Rule: Pokemon are placed in either Attack Mode or Defense Mode. When in Attack Mode, attacks get +20% BP but Pokemon are subjected to Taunt (excepting Protect / Detect). When in Defense Mode, Pokemon have a random 20% chance of not moving (starting turn two), but heal 5% at the end of each turn. You may switch between modes but only once per turn, and not after attacking.
  
• 1st/18th: Rohypnol with Kingdra, reffed by Buzzer Special Rule: Light Side / Dark Side FFA. Pokémon will be rolled into either side of the force and those are your teams. Winning Team gets extra 1K.
  
• 1st/21th: WinterVines with Espeon, reffed by SiberianTiger Special Rule: Haze when a Pokemon boosts pass +3

Comics

Each week, besides the submissions from our employees for the Comics section of the URPG Times, we also welcome submissions from the community! Remember, I pay $1,500 for each submission usually. The amount paid might be adjusted accordingly based on your comic and permanent employees will be paid slightly higher. You don't have to be a professional as well; the only criteria is for it to be funny! PM comic submissions to me, Ataro.


ALL ARE COCKS By Pidge


The Truth By SLCalamity


[Untitled] By SLCalamity


3 Steel Pokémon Walk Into A Bar By Ryoku


The Adventures of Keith #001 - Noob Police Incoming By SLCalamity
(Note: Reference made to trainers whom started with Chimchars that are noob weren't meant to be. It was simply a very common choice.)

Thank you for your submissions! We had a large variety of comics this week. I hoped you have enjoyed them as much as I did! Pidge, you get to claim $2,000. All of the others can claim in the HQ thread. :shy:

 

Article: Panic About Presents
By Tyranitex

Panic About Presents
What To Do About The Easter Gift Away?​

Spring is just around the corner. To the many members of the URPG, this means many different things. Personally, spring means lots of rain, clamoring to get homework done to have more time outside, and watching the mother hummingbird come back to her seasonal nest and raise the newst addition to her family.

However, one thing that spring means to all of those that are reading this, well those that count, at least (I'm looking at you lurkers), is the Easter Give Away. This event although named Easter, is actually the same as the Spring Gift Away/Stations that URPG holds annually. As with its counterpart, the Christmas Give Away, members of the URPG are given the three chances in a year to gift their friends and acquaintances Pokémon and items. Normally, they would have to trade to allow another URPGer to obtain something in their stats. It is a truly rare event indeed.

Now, this event may bring an array of emotions. Those of you that are bathing in the cash will probably be fairly comfortable buying and gifting many Pokémon and items to others. However, those of us that do not have all four jobs and have a battle every five minutes are pretty panicked. We want to get everyone of our friends something, yet we do not have the income to do so. Not to fret, though. Here are some strategies that I have come up with to counteract this common quandry.

1. You know that crappy Pokémon that has been stagnating in your stats for months? Why not check around and see if you can get a decent trade for it? Usually, someone out there wants what you've got. If it's something that's pretty rare but not that useful in battle, trade it to a collector like Bumblebee or Scourge of Nemo. If not, then try to use it in as many battles as possible. If it's a basic Pokémon, then commit it to Permabasics and exploit those easy 1v1's for mega money. Even if you don't win, 500 per battle adds up.
   
   
2. Strapped for cash? There are two main ways to get money in the URPG: battle and get a job. Battling is the most time effective due to the fact that wages are paid periodically. If you go hunting around for some battles, odds are you can find some. The only drawback would be if you don't have AIM. AIM is essential to quick and high paying battles.
   
   
3. Try to be on AIM as much as possible just in case there is a FFA. Free For All battles are crazy battles that involve as many trainers as a given ref can stuff into a chat room. Each trainer sends their Pokémon privately to the ref and the the ref posts all of the Pokémon (no names attached) in the chat. You then send moves targeting Pokémon or yourself privately to the ref. These tend to last a long time and are very tedious if you last up until the final throes. However, these battles pay a very large amount of money. Also, refs are allowed to add certain fun rules to the battle, like all Pokémon start with subs @ 75% or you don't see the Pokémon, but rather the names of the trainers.
   
   
4. Many items at the store are permanent, fairly useful, and pretty cheap. Check out the Choice items(3k) and Earthquake(6k). Both are pretty much essential in any gym battle and both are extremely reasonably priced. That's not all, though. Several pre-evolutions to high tiered Pokémon are priced really low at the Pokemart. Crobat, Golem, Raichu, Togekiss, Ampharos, Roserade, and Swoobat all are readily avaliable after a purchase and a few basics battles. Not only that, but all of the Pokémon I just mentioned have pre-evolutions at the mart that are set at an unbelievable 5k! I'd get on that quick if I were you.
   
   
5. The last tip I have is centered around the more higher middle class members of the URPG. If you can't think of what to buy even after cross referencing the Pokemart with your friends' stats, just buy them all Daycare Passes. Set at 10k a pop, these passes allow for your friend to get two daycare moves free of charge and are readily avaliable at the giveaway. A few daycare moves can never go amiss so this is the quintessential present. Though they aren't priced down for the occasion, your friend will love you for it as these babies are usually a Godsend for avid trainers.

Have fun at the Easter Give Away, but don't let your wallet get too thin!

By Tyranitex.
April 20th, 2011.​

Featured Member Interview Q&A: Derian
By Alaskapigeon

I watched my prey from behind a desk in the URPG Times office. He was walking towards the meeting room, unaware that I was about to strike. Finally, the moment came. I pounced.

“HUGTACKLE!” I yelled and hugtackled Derian, knocking him to the floor.

“AGH!” he shouted in surprise.

“Hi, Derian.” I climbed off of him and back to my feet.

“Hey.”

I pulled a pencil and notepad off a random desk. Hopefully, Ataro wouldn’t get mad at me for stealing them. “Can I interview you for the URPG Times?”

“Alrighty,” he said, dusting himself off. “Do you have any questions?”

“Hmmm… not that I’ve planned out.”

“Good game.”

“Actually, wait. How do you think you’re going to do in the FFA tourney?”

He thought for a moment. “Well, my record in FFAs has been decent so far, so I’m hoping I can at least place sort of well. But I’m not keeping my expectations too high.”

“So… um. You look kind of like a stoner. Are you high right now?”

He stared at me. I glanced back. “Was that an actual question?”

“Yes.”

“I’m not not not not high.”

I cocked my head to the side. “So how did you celebrate 4/20 then?”

“That previous sentence was a lie, by the way, and I celebrated by eating lots and lots of candy. I just went to this convenience store on campus and stocked up on candy and ate it all in about half an hour.”

Now it was my turn to stare. “Son, I am disappoint.” I shook my head. “Let’s see here, if you had to sleep with anyone in the URPG, who would it be and why?” Before he could make up an excuse not to answer, I added, “Yes, you have to answer that. The public needs to know.”

“Well, that depends on if you mean ‘have sex with’ or not, and if so, Roulette. If not, then also Roulette.”

I laughed politely, but I wasn’t sure gay marriage was allowed anywhere in the south. I thought about what he had said. “So like, he had the Ice Dojo before you, does that make you like Batman and Robin? Actually, never mind, you said you wanted to sleep together, that’s kind of an answer.” I changed the subject. “Out of the entire URPG, in order of who’s the best at battling, where would you place yourself?”

“Somewhere in the top half, maybe, but that could be too optimistic. There are a lot of people who suck though, so I don’t mean it too egotistically.”

“If you had to describe the URPG in one song, what would it be?”

“Violent Pornography by System of a Down,” he said without hesitation.

“Final question, will you bear my child?”

He looked me dead in the eye. “If we ever had sex, you would die from the sheer intensity.”

I copied everything he said down.

“This was great,” I said, “but I gotta run. Catch ya’ later.” I began to run off.

“ALL ARE COCKS!” he yelled after me. He must’ve been voting for Pidge.


Featured Gym Leader Interview Q&A: Team Evolution
By pman

This weak, Team Evolution has taken time out from his busy schedule to bow down to the ultimate test of vanity, being interviewed by me about the most important thing in the world - how good a gym leader is he?

Pman: Hello.

Team Evolution: Hey!

Pman: Glad you could spare some time.

Team Evolution: Oh. no problem. Masturbation can come later.

Pman: I suppose the first question is which gym you own, and what it's like to lead?

Team Evolution: Well, at the moment, I lead Mikan Gym. It's an Orange Island gym; it differs from normal gyms with its rules and prizes. To some people, leading this gym could be seemed as easy but others make it look hard. The rules are strict, since it's a 3v3 match up and strictly only Water-types can be used.

Pman: That must present some interesting challenges...

Team Evolution: Yes. Your opponent should have no type advantage against you and it makes the battle quite fair.

Pman: So it's a good measure of pure skill?

Team Evolution: Yes, this is why I call myself the water master! Well, also because I've owned all Water-type gyms - Cerulean, Pastoria, Sootopolis, and now Mikan.

Pman: How do battles in Mikan differ from the others?

Team Evolution: Well, you can only use battle revolution mechanics (Revolution, Collosseum, Stadium, or B/W Revolution), so you have no advantage in forcing the opponent to send first. Not only that, you will have to fight without seeing their moves, thus making it harder to predict and counter their moves.

Pman: What is the biggest challenge you have had as leader of any gym?

Team Evolution: I have had no big challenges. So far, I've lost because of my own mistakes or due to hax (4/2 record at the moment). This is probably the worst record I’ve had for a while. I had 9/1 for Cerulean and 5/1 for Pastoria. Ataro is going to challenge me soon, so I expect him to be my biggest challenge so far.

Pman: So the evidence is on the table, you’re a good leader. However, what is your most exciting battle, in and outside of gym?

Team Evolution: Inside of a gym would probably be when I beat Ataro in his gym, just beating him and putting the egg on his face was good to see. For outside of the gym, would probably be a 6v6 FUN battle I had with Pidge a few months ago. It was a well fought battle where Pidge used his legends against me and in the end due to a reffing mistake, I lost XD2: he sent an extra Pokémon for me).

Pman: I actually vaguely recall reading about that battle ... there aren't enough people that battle for fun these days. How often do you battle for just the sake of the enjoyment?

Team Evolution: Not often. The battles that I am in these days are either for gym, against a gym, defending LD (lost) or tournament battles. No one wants to battle me for fun these days. :bawl:

Pman: What is your favorite gym Pokémon and why?

Team Evolution: It would be probably Marill. It has an impressive movepool along with a very good ability in Huge Power, which doubles the Attack stat. Along with rain and a Choice Band, it will be able to hit a lot of enemy Pokémon with some hefty damage, especially with a priority Aqua Jet attack.

Pman: All of your opponent's Pokémon know Water-type moves. Exactly how useful is the rain weather?

Team Evolution: It is useful when the opponent has no Pokémon with Swift Swim. I can then use the rain against them with a Pokémon like Ludicolo, which has Swift Swim and has a very impressive movepool along with STAB Grass-type attacks.

Pman: Given Kingdra's very limited movepool and the fact that it is easily walled by Empoleon, how often do you use it?

Team Evolution: I use it quite often as a matter of fact. Not a lot of people have Empoleon, but when they use it, I will always have Ludicolo around to Drain Punch. Actually, Empoleon can't even wall my Kingdra; mine has Hidden Power (Fighting).

Pman: There speaks a lucky man. If you don't mind me asking, what do you in in real life, other than being an impressive Water-type gym leader?

Team Evolution: At the moment, I'm in Year 12. It's the last year of school so I'm trying to work hard (trying lol) to get into a decent college/university.

Pman: Ah. The stress of that final year of school. I'll let you go masturbate now, thanks for your time.

Team Evolution: Okay, bye!! :ksmile:

---

Team Evolution actually went off to argue with everyone’s favorite referee, Ataro, about who was a better battler, I’m sure our glorious editor has a strong opinion on the subject. As an aside, he also really failed the vanity test.

That’s all for this week folks, remember, the gym leaders are always looking to battle so contact them whenever you like.

(Editor's Note: Actually, I don't. :goof

 

Pokémon Of The Week
Randomly Chosen By Ataro

In every issue of the URPG Times, I will randomly choose a "Pokémon Of The Week". If you're a member of the URPG, and you happen to have that Pokémon, you will win $1,000! Just reply to this thread to claim your money! It's that simple!

​

Think you know that Pokémon? That's right! It's Empoleon! All of you penguin owners just reply to this thread to claim your $1,000!


Trainer Of The Week
Stats Collected By MuddyMudkip

Ooh-la-la! Who is our Trainer Of The Week for this week!? Will it be a new face? Or a familiar face? They are ... Ryoku and Tyranitex! Ryoku have completed a decent amount of 53 battles, while Tyranitex holds the record for most number of non-basic battles done at 17. Let's give them a round of applause. Both of you get to claim $1,500 each. Simply reply to this thread to claim your prizes.


Story Of The Week
By evanfardreamer

This week's Story Of The Week is Mysterious Documents by Metabee. A shorter story with a lot of foreshadowing. It includes a cameo by a familiar face - but not turning the protagonist into a Mary Sue. It also features a Primeape, who I feel is under-appreciated, and a very convincing feel of the atmosphere around a solitary campfire.

As the author, Metabee may collect a $1,500 prize. Try not to spend it all in one place!


Roleplayer Of The Week
By WinterVines

This week's Roleplayer Of The Week is Roulette Dares! He's currently on a run through Meteor Valley. Rumor has it that he's looking for an Abra, Zorua or Pawniard, among others, and he's already bagged a Haunter. The cool part about Roulette is that he's going in as a different character than last time, this time role playing as a big game hunter named Tony Heath. The run has been fun so far, and it can only get better. Toby Keith approves.

As the roleplayer, Roulette Dares gets to collect $1,500. Have fun with it!


Spendthrift Of The Week
Stats Collected By Bumblebee

Who is our biggest spender for this week? It is a familiar resident Bidoof. That's right. Our Spendthrift Of The Week is Husnain! He spent a grand total amount of $117,500. Good job. You get to claim a whopping rebate of $1,500... Simply reply to this thread to claim. :lick:


Closing Comment
See all of you next week! :awww:

 

Claiming for Empoleon

 

Lol at Pidges comic

 

Claiming for Emp

 

csb

I mean good issue. Ryoku, that's some good art there and funny.

Claiming 2,000.

 

1k for Empoleon and 1.5k for RPer of the week. Thanks


EDIT: Oh right, great art everyone. The comics have been hilarious lately.

 

I have empoleon I claim 1k ^,^

 

Claiming for Emp

 

Claiming 1k for Empoleon. Lol'd at Pidge's comic and TE.

 

$1,000,000,000 for Empoleon

Thanks. :XD2:

 

Taking my 1.5k for spending almost 100x the amount :flinch:

 

Claiming for TOTW. And if you like my art now, just wait until I get used to the Cintiq tablet I was using. XP

 

Claiming 100% prediction accuracy. Aww yeah. Oh, and Empoleon (Will be NUKEM again soon)

 

claiming empoleon

 

FFAs added.

 

Claiming 2.5k for TOTW and Emp.
kthxbai

 

And claiming 1K for Empy. In case anyone was wondering, Ataro allowed me to claim for things that happened two months ago since I was gone. XD